Friday, March 26, 2010

Heaven Lies

Underneath the feet of your mothers :)
I never realized how motherhood is really uniquely hard until lately.
I've been in the obstetric and gynaecology department (obsgyn) for 5 weeks now, and here i found it different from the other departments I've been through.

, for me, I've always been interested in this field of study because I really think pregnancy and baby delivery is a miraculous process. Like you literally create a LIFE out of nothing (well, God creates life, through us). I mean it is really your choice, to unite the sperms and the ovum to form a zygote, a baby to be. Here in obsgyn you learn how to manage the pregnancy, which is clearly your choice, to make it safe until the time of delivery, making sure the moms and the babies get through the process alive and healthy, and happy.

Two, you witness so many different emotions here and there, from the moment a couple comes to you with the wife's late period, you can see from their faces, some are really expecting, for it's their first or second babies to be, some others expecting you to tell them it's not true, for they've already got eight ungrown kiddos at home. For you, to be the one breaking the news, you'll learn how to deal with all of those responses. Once you tell them there is a heartbeat inside, you 360 degree-ly change their life from then on :) You can almost burst to tears of happiness along with them, yet you can also feel pity from unexpected babies. This is what you call empathy, something you learn by doing. Something some other professions than doctors don't get. You learn how to control yourself, not letting it change into sympathy, nor to judgement and assumption.

Three, you see how mothers really struggle for the sake of their babies. How fathers will do anything to keep mommies and babies to be safe. How annoying they become, so talkative and so critical asking this and that, just to make sure their babies are okay. You will smile watching this, for you'll remember how your mom and dad treated you and worried about you back then before and when you were a baby:) And witnessing the process of delivery, there is no other thing in the world shows greater love and sacrifice. This is one only scene where somebody is on unimaginable pain but undescribably happy. This is, true love.

Four is the most unpleasant thing. Witnessing them losing their babies. Happens everytime, to find their wombs are once again empty. No further words. It is just the saddest thing you'll ever watch. To see the glow in their eyes fading, the curve on their lips turning down, the tears they try to hide. You cannot hug them though you want to. You cannot cry with them though you want to. It's professionalism. You can only smile and hold their hands. No words can describe.

So I'm really looking forward to learn further about obsgyn. For I feel my calling here. I don't know what will happen, for the near future is still waiting, the internship and all, but hopefully I can reach my dream, to help God creating more cheerful and happy lives, to reduce the unnecessary amounts of those He has to take back :)

Oiya, here, meet the greatest parents in the world :)

No word can describe how grateful I am to God for letting me have them.
No word can describe my love for them, and I know it is nothing, compared to their love for me.

"Ya Allah, forgive me my sins, and the sins of my parents, have mercy on them both as they have looked after me when I was little"

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